


both the moon and the stars

by asianradishhh



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Confessions, First Kiss, Flashbacks, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Insecure Yamaguchi Tadashi, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Tsukishima is a nerd, Yamaguchi Tadashi's Freckles, might be a little ooc but who cares, theyre talking abt the moon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:42:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26866105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asianradishhh/pseuds/asianradishhh
Summary: “Listen, you said it yourself; your freckles remind me of the stars. You’re in everything I see, it’s so annoying, and I can’t get rid of it. Are you satisfied, now?” Tsukishima snapped, crossing his arms. He closed his eyes in frustration.After a moment or two, Yamaguchi worked up the courage to ask, “How can I be both the moon and the stars?”The blond sighed again, looking the opposite direction of the other boy. “You’re both of them to me. That’s how.”Yamaguchi is insecure, but sometimes all it takes is a sarcastic, glasses-wearing blond to make it all better. And maybe, a deep talk about the bright things in the sky.
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 152





	both the moon and the stars

**Author's Note:**

> i absolutely love yamaguchi, so cue me falling hard for this ship  
> this is my first hq fic so hope you enjoy! :- )

After their club practice that ended up being hours longer than they’d expected, Tsukishima and his best friend since childhood, Yamaguchi Tadashi, had begun their walk home. Typically, they would walk until Yamaguchi had to split for his separate ball practice, but it was different today; he hadn’t needed to go, strangely enough. The two walked in their usual silence, other than the occasional light conversation the green-haired boy would make. Usually, Tsukishima would leave his headphones around his neck whenever he was with his friend because, although he’d never admit to it, he actually cares about the stuff he says to him. Another thing he won’t admit is that the only person he’d do this to is Yamaguchi alone, and not even his brother or mother.

  


When they did talk, it was always about anything and everything, from Hinata missing his spikes to how good meat buns sound right now. Not that they could grab anything of course, considering how late it is, so most stores were probably closed by now. Not even their coach, Ukai-san, would allow them one exception. Tsukishima took his phone out, his bright home screen glowing against his thumb. The time read 9 PM. He also noticed the few notifications he’d received from his mother and ones from Yamaguchi that were still left unopened. He hadn’t bothered to check them, since he would always end up telling him about it the next day. Today, however, he was a tad less quieter than he usually was. But, with Tsukki being Tsukki, he didn’t mention it at all. Perhaps it was because he knew to let him talk at his own pace.

  


“Hey, Tsukki,” The other boy broke the silence, catching his friend’s attention. The blond turned his head to face him, expression genuine with curiosity. “D-don’t take this the wrong way, but…”

  


Tsukishima quirked an eyebrow at the way Yamaguchi trailed off with his sentence. He’d always known him to be the timid type, considering he even had to save him from bullies once during their childhood, but it was different this time, in a way. Only someone who knew him awhile could tell, so he could see it for sure. The way his small nose flares for a quarter of a second, his eyes blink twice instead of once, and his freckles that scrunch just a little along with the corners of his eyes.

  


“Go on?” He encouraged, his brows losing all tension.

  


Though his tone was gentler than it mostly would be, Yamaguchi only fiddled with the skin on his fingers and averted his eye contact, as if embarrassed or ashamed. “During the practice matches with Fukurodani, I heard that Bokuto-san called you ‘Tsukki’.”

  


“And?”

  


“And you told him not to call you that.”

  


The blond only grew more confused, not catching onto what his friend was trying to say. He continued, despite looking like he was about to pass out.

  
“I was wondering… if you want me to stop calling you ‘Tsukki’, too,” The green-haired one finally got to the point.

  


“Huh?” Tsukishima responded with his usual calm voice, but by the way he stuttered a little on his footsteps, his statement clearly took him by surprise. “Why would you think that?”

  


“I-I don’t know, it’s just, I know it’s a childish nickname. And if it makes you uncomfortable, I can stop calling you by that!”

  


“Yamaguchi.”

  


The blond sighed. Knowing that his close friend was getting worked up over absolutely nothing made him a little annoyed, but, he also felt a little bad. He felt bad that his friend was so nervous to say something as small as that to him. If anything, it made Tsukishima feel like he was the one doing something wrong, with that logic. He was also aware that if this were anybody else, he wouldn’t care about what they thought; he figured that if they were worried about something, it was their problem. But for some dumb reason, if Yamaguchi were worried about something, Tsukishima felt like doing anything he could to make that worry go away. Maybe it was the look on his face, how he would look so devastated over his own mistakes. Or perhaps it was because he hadn’t done anything about it all those times his friend was sad before.

  


And right now, Yamaguchi needed an answer; an honest one. “You’re not Bokuto. If you were, I wouldn’t even be talking with you right now.”

  


The other boy blinked twice again, except that his eyes were locked onto the blond’s and his hands slowly began to rest. His mouth was pressed into a thin line, and his eyebrows were furrowed a bit.

  


“You can still call me ‘Tsukki’,” He answered bluntly.

  


Apparently the answer wasn’t enough to calm his nerves though, because the only reaction he got in response was Yamaguchi avoiding eye contact for the umpteenth time. He was awfully quiet, and it wasn’t anything like the comfortable silence earlier.

  


“Ah, o-okay… If you say so,” he said reluctantly. “Sorry for ruining the atmosphere.”

  


Okay, now his worry is getting increasingly more annoying. It was starting to make Tsukishima feel a bit concerned as well; only a  _ bit. _ “Yamaguchi, what are you even  _ talking _ about?”

  


“I must’ve ruined the mood with my over-worrying,” He gave a smile, but it had no true emotion behind it. “I don’t even know why you hang out with me. I don’t know why you only let me call you ‘Tsukki’, either.”

  


Tsukishima shot him a look that lasted for an uncomfortable three seconds, and casually took a seat on the bench they were walking by. Realizing he’d done so, his friend scrambled to grab the spot next to him. They sat with their hands in their pockets, the cool, spring air of the night brushing their hair against the back of their necks. The blond looked up at the clear sight of the moon, seeing that it was almost full. His friend only sat at a distance, staring at his folded hands and occasionally glancing at the other boy. Yamaguchi’s face was a little flushed, but Tsukishima assumed it was from the night breeze; it’d make sense considering that tonight  _ is _ a little colder than the rest.

  


“The moon’s almost full,” he said, startling the other just slightly.

  


From the corner of his eye, he saw that Yamaguchi decided to look up as well. “I can’t really see it.”

  


Tsukishima clicked his tongue, obviously fed up by the green-haired boy. “Maybe if you sat closer to me, you’d see it, idiot.”

  


A moment of hesitation later, Yamaguchi slid across the bench until he was about a couple inches away from the blond. Then, Tsukishima decided that he was still too far. So, logically, he pulled him closer by the waist as his friend jumped at the sudden touch. In response to the unexpected intimacy, his face felt like it was going to melt from the heat it was radiating and his legs shook uncontrollably. However, his attention was immediately brought to the other boy pointing a finger up at the moon.

  


“You know what phase that is?”

  


“No…”

  


“That’s the waxing gibbous, meaning that the moon is growing into its final phase,” Tsukishima explained. With his eyes still maintaining contact with the bright ball in the heavens as it reflected against his lenses, he continued. “Kind of like you.”

  


Yamaguchi’s breath caught in his throat, his rapid heartbeat seeming to be the only functional part of him. He was about to speak against the statement until he caught a glimpse of the pale moonlight shining on the face of his best friend. The sight was breathtaking, and one like no other. His face was serious, but it was relaxed; a state he doesn’t see often. Being this close, he could see that Tsukishima is… really,  _ really _ pretty, actually.

  


“What makes you say that?” He asks, tearing his eyes away from the blond.

  


“I’ve seen it,” he simply stated. “I can see you becoming the best version of yourself. Everyday, you’re improving as a player, and a person. That’s you, growing into your final phase, even if you don’t think so.”

  


He ruffled his short, curly hair with his hand and took a deep breath. His hands folded his glasses and set them into his lap, his eyebrows drawing inwards while doing so. “I can’t wish to be like you, since you really are like the moon; no matter how many times I try to chase you, I can never reach you. But… I do wish that you can see yourself the way I see you.”

  


Now what was he supposed to say to that? The Tsukishima Kei, known for being a cold, volleyball-playing jerk, actually saying something that could count as sweet? It almost sounds like a joke,  _ almost, _ but the dusted pink on his freckled cheeks says otherwise; he really wanted to believe it. Yamaguchi couldn’t tell if his friend was frustrated or if he really thought so positively of him. Yet again, he didn’t sound as firm as he usually would, so maybe there was  _ something, _ even if he didn’t mean any of it. His demeanor wasn’t completely deadpan, it actually seemed much softer, but maybe it was just his imagination? What if he was just saying that to make him feel better about himself? Upon closer inspection, Yamaguchi could see that Tsukishima still looked agitated, and…

  


_ Oh. _ He’s blushing. The green-haired boy smiled shyly and looked down at his palms, face contented.

  


“You’re so smart, Tsukki.”

  


The blond’s expression remained unchanged. “How’s the atmosphere now?”

  


“Not that bad, I guess,” Yamaguchi admitted.

  


“Tch. After all the hard work I put into my speech?”

  


The other boy giggled at his friend’s grumbling. Never had Tsukishima heard something so pure in his entire life. “You know, it’s kind of ironic… I mean, ‘Tsukki’ means ‘moon’, after all.”

  


“Yeah, I guess it does. There are a lot of things we don’t realize, I suppose.”

  


The two of them leaned back, their hands a mere centimeter apart between them. The only sounds in the air were the buzzes of cicadas, the calls of crickets, and the restless wind. It was the dead of night, absolutely perfect for thinking. Not that he’d needed to do much of that; most of the time, he thinks about Tsukishima, but what good is that when he’s in his presence? He imagines what it’d feel like to stay like this forever. Maybe not at this exact location or this exact time, but by his best friend’s side. Quiet days and nights, talking about stuff like this, what better to spend it with the one person he would only do it with? It was a beautiful dream.

  


One that he’s had since the beginning of their friendship, but dreams will be dreams; he might as well enjoy it once, even if it’s just for tonight. All the things Tsukishima said about him floated around in his brain. He had called him the moon, and meant it. He told him he was better than him, and meant it. Nobody could’ve said it more Tsukishima-y than the guy himself, and that’s what made it so imperfectly perfect. He recalled the day he first realized he was in love with him; it was a Tuesday, their first year of middle school. Yamaguchi was caught by Tsukishima, after he realized his friend wasn’t anywhere to be seen in the volleyball club. He knew he never missed a meeting, and when everybody in the club told him they hadn't seen Yamaguchi anywhere near the gym, he naturally decided to look for him.

  


It wasn’t long until he found a small, green-haired boy still slumped over his desk, reading a wrinkled piece of paper on his desk. Tsukishima was a little irritated that he would skip a meeting just for a dumb test grade, or at least that’s what he thought at the time.

  


“Yamaguchi, where were you? I didn’t see you in the club, so I thought…” The blond stormed over to where his friend sat, but taking a closer look, he realized it wasn’t a bad test grade at all. It was a very poor drawing, made to mock Yamaguchi. The freckles, especially, were heavily emphasized.

  


That day, Tsukishima thought, for the first time, that it wouldn’t hurt to skip practice just  _ once _ . They spent their after hours at his place, where Yamaguchi met his brother and mother. Not that he hasn’t seen them before of course; there was that time where they both saw his brother on the bleachers, rather than in the game itself, but they chose to forget it ever happened. They spent a lot of time in Tsukishima’s room, playing video games and watching television. It was a great distraction, and soon enough, the orange sky had faded into a dark shade of navy, like a switch had been flipped off in heaven. And although the blond never said anything, he was happy Yamaguchi was feeling better about himself by the time it was night.

  


They decided that stargazing sounded like a fun idea, considering Tsukishima’s interest in astronomy. Yamaguchi usually just follows him with whatever he does, but stargazing didn’t sound like the worst idea; after all, the standards were pretty set after the time his friend had suggested they spend a whole hour studying, which was the  _ only _ time Yamaguchi had actually objected to something Tsukki had wanted to do. The two made their way to the backdoor, the green-haired boy holding onto the blond’s arm. Fortunately, the stars were bright and clouds were nowhere to be seen that night. They laid in the trimmed grass as it poked various parts of their bodies and tickled their bare feet. With how silent the air was, Yamaguchi thought about the day’s events once again.

  


“Tsukishima,” His frown deepened, and he could feel his throat tightening with each syllable. “Was what they said true? Are my freckles really ugly?”

  


“No, they’re not.”

  


“A-are you sure?” He felt tears creeping into his eyes.

  


“Don’t be lame,” The blond said, rolling onto his side to face his best friend. “They remind me of the stars, and those are cool.”

  


The green-haired boy stared in awe and happiness. His mouth was agape in fascination. “Th-they are!?”

  


Tsukishima’s face flushed a deep red, and his eyebrows drew together. “Don’t make me say it again, stupid!”

  


“Sorry, Tsukishima,” he said, face still smiling widely.

  


He looked away bashfully, lips in a pout and eyebrows unchanged. “You can call me Tsukki if you want.”

  


“O-oh…”

  


“I said only if you want, not like you have to.”

  


“Okay, Tsukki!”

  


Thinking about the day that meant everything to him made him smile warmly. His feelings were the same as they were ever since then.

  


“Hey, do you remember the day you said my freckles reminded you of the stars?”

  


Tsukishima sucked in a breath, and hesitantly answered. “Yeah.”

  


“That was also the first day I called you ‘Tsukki’.”

  


“It was.”

  


“Y-you’re sure you’re not uncomfortable with it, right?”

  


_ “No, _ Yamaguchi. I’m  _ not _ uncomfortable with it.”

  


“But what if other people use it-”

  


_ “You’re not other people.” _ With every word he spoke, his irritation grew. “You’re… special. To me. Or whatever.”

  


“Wha-”

  


“Listen, you said it yourself, your freckles remind me of the stars. You’re in everything I see, it’s  _ so _ annoying, and I  _ can’t _ get rid of it. Are you satisfied, now?” Tsukishima snapped, crossing his arms. He closed his eyes in frustration.

  


After a moment or two, Yamaguchi worked up the courage to ask, “How can I be both the moon and the stars?”

  


The blond sighed again, looking the opposite direction of the other boy. “You’re both of them to me. That’s how.”

  


The green-haired boy stared in complete shock. Where’s the  _ real _ Tsukishima? Because this could not be him. He wouldn’t act like this to anybody, not even to his closest friend in the world. It wasn’t that he was not enjoying it of course, but he felt a little bad taking these compliments when he’s the one who’s head over heels over him.

  


“T-Tsukki, I don’t understa-”

  


The feeling of lips crashing onto his own immediately interrupted his train of thought. His eyes were wide open, his hands were clenched onto the bench for support since his knees gave in, and he was stuck admiring his best friend from a very,  _ very _ close view. He noticed the flutter of his blond eyelashes, the furrow in his brow, the tired bags underneath his eyes, everything that made Tsukishima so… Tsukishima. And it was absolutely stunning. The feeling was indescribable, but he knew it was so right and it couldn’t have happened as perfectly as it did any other time. It really was like a dream, the way his slightly larger hands cupped the sides of his face. He’s imagined it so many times before, but for it to actually happen seemed as possible as being the real moon itself.

  


Unfortunately, it wasn’t long before the blond pulled away ever so slightly, resting his forehead against Yamaguchi’s, the tips of their noses barely touching. He could feel his breath warming his own lips that still burned with the sensation of Tsukki’s, and his heartbeat began to slow to match his friend’s.

  


“Kei-”

  
“You should understand by now,” Tsukishima’s eyes opened a sliver, but only barely. “God, you don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to do that.”

  


Yamaguchi grabbed the blond’s left hand which remained on his cheek with his own, and rubbed gentle circles into the back of it. He leaned forward once more to catch another soft, gentle kiss, taking every ounce of courage he might’ve had left.

  


“I think I do know,” He breathed out in response, their eyes full of longing. 

  


“You’re so cool, Tadashi, and so worth it. You’re the moon, the stars, the entire universe. That’s how I see you.”

  


“Kei,” Yamaguchi felt his eyes watering. “I-I know you said you could never reach me, but… I think you just did. You have for a long time…”

  


“What?”

  


“I’ve liked you ever since middle school, you know,” he finally confesses, eyes dropping down at his friend’s lips, just to shoot back up, meeting his gaze once again.

  


“I suppose I can say… that’s when I realized it, too,” Tsukishima admits, as well. “Although, it was just this year that I found out I was in love with you. Still am.”

  


Yamaguchi’s eyes widened in slight shock and disbelief; he, Tsukishima Kei, was  _ in love with him,  _ too. He just never expected the blond to be the one to say it before he did; honestly, he thought it was pathetic that he wasn’t the one to confess being in love first, but at least he got to hear it from his best friend.

  


“Tsukki, I…” He gulped, eyes watering just a bit. “I love you.”

  


The two looked yearningly into each other's eyes for a brief second. It wasn’t long until Tsukishima checked his buzzing phone, seeing that it was already 9:36 PM, and his brother was messaging him to ask what he was doing so late at night. Annoyed at the interruption, he powered the device off.

  


“We should head back, it’s already late,” He states gingerly, tucking his phone back into his pocket. Yamaguchi gave a small nod in agreement before getting up from the bench, following his friend’s movements once more.

  


“Tsukki?”

  


“Yeah?”

  


“Are we, um, boyfriends now?” He asked sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.

  


Tsukishima looked back with complete disbelief and confusion. “You mean I literally called you my everything, kissed you twice, admitted how I liked you for years, and you’re still unsure of that?”

  


“Oh, I mean, I guess that would make sense…”

  


“By the way, if you tell anybody about the things I said, we’re done,” he said in a serious tone, his face turning red in embarrassment and obviously not meaning real malice behind it.

  


Yamaguchi only laughed in amusement. “Okay, Tsukki!”

  


They began the rest of the walk to their designated places, the green-haired boy cautiously bumping his hand against the others, testing the waters. After about a minute, Tsukishima ended up being the one to lace their hands together, and it stayed like that for a while. Yamaguchi smiled dopily as the blond tried to play it cool, acting as if his own heart wasn’t racing at two hundred beats per minute. The night had gone a lot better than either of them would’ve expected, and Yamaguchi could definitely say that the atmosphere is not ruined whatsoever. He believes that Tsukishima was being truthful with his words, and that he really thinks he’s the most important person in the world to him. And he knows exactly what that feeling’s like, because that’s what he feels when he thinks about his boyfriend.

  


“Hey, wanna stay over and stargaze so you can tell me how cool my freckles are again?” The green-haired boy gave a toothy grin and hopeful eyes.

  


“Shut up, Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima remarked, his face flushing again.

  


“Sorry, Tsukki…” He just replies with that same smile on his face.

**Author's Note:**

> fun fact, i didnt really like tsukishima until i started liking tsukiyama and i think my character development is beautiful


End file.
